Monday, February 14, 2011

Resolved amicably





A romantic start to the day. Off, bright and early, with 'the font' and Wilf to the cafe in the market town. 'The font' got an early morning coffee while Wilf got the crumbs from the bottom of the croissant tray. These were drizzled slowly into his mouth amid much lip smacking and nose licking. Wilf seemed delighted.

Since the start of the month 'the font' has been suggesting that we ( note the 'we' ) give up wine for a month. This act of self denial will supposedly be good for my health. Something to do with giving the liver a rest. Thanks to the stress generated by the blocked septic tank and the fuel leak from the Range Rover implementation of this ridiculous suggestion has been successfully delayed. Tonight there will be champagne. After that I will need to dream up some new excuses for prevarication. The most obvious is the upcoming Scotland / England game in the Six Nations. No way can that be watched without the help of a bottle of Bordeaux's finest.

As we're never in London it seemed sensible to let out the flat. The tenants an Australian couple. He something 'big' in a bank. She floral suited and seemingly jovial. This morning at six am , an e-mail :

Dear Sir: I am greatly disappointed to note that 1) There is a chip in the rim of one of the champagne glasses 2) there is one less egg cup than recorded in the inventory and 3) there are smear marks on top of the air conditioning vents in the hallway. I very much hope these matters can be resolved amicably.

This missive is forwarded onto the cleaners. Four busy and deeply devout Irish ladies from Sligo. They arrive at the flat, en masse, twice a week. What they will make of this woman standing on top of an eight foot ladder peering into the ventilation ducts remains to be seen. Must be some form of OCD. Wilfs attitude to the e-mail : " We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak ".

35 comments:

  1. One can never have too many egg cups!

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  2. For real? Some people have far too much time on their hands!

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  3. one less egg cup?? hahahahahahaha seriously? Happy Valentines Day to you and missus and ole dear fluffy fellow.

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  4. Angus, sense of humour failure here. I am struggling to find that email funny. Some people are so spoilt.
    On a brighter note - Happy Valentines Day to Wilf! What a wonderful old boy you are.
    Cheers! Gail.

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  5. Only the whinging Aussies! Send them a bottle of sparkling Shiraz and an Easter egg!

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  6. that is hilarious!!
    and i will remember Wilfs words of wisdom!
    (might come in handy one day)
    xoxo

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  7. We fear that this is just the start of ever escalating, nit picking demands. Obviously the encephalopathic results of a cirrhotic liver. Put them out at first chance.

    What a lovely valentine. It must be wonderful to feel like that if only for a moment.
    All of your followers love you very much, Wilf. Will you be our valentine?

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  8. Why do I suspect the new renters might become a new and entertaining facet of the blog? I think you have your excuse for continuing to drink right there in that e-mail my friend!

    Wilf's wisdom is right on, as always! Happy Valentine's Day to both of you.

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  9. I hope the lady in the floral suit never comes to inspect my house. Pee stains on the living room carpet and dust on the stairs. Come-on the house is lived-in by 2 people and a dog!Hugs to all on Valentine's Day, lot's of kisses coming Wilf's way. Good luck cutting down on the wine consumption, I fear a slow down in wine sales will further hurt France's economy!

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  10. How many soft-boiled eggs is she planning on serving at once?

    Happy Valentine's wishes and a kiss blown across the Atlantic and over the Pyrennes to land softly on Wilf's head, it's intended recipient.

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  11. Oh dear - if this continues you may have to kick those two to the curb or write scathingly astute blog remarks which we will all greatly enjoy. Sounds like someone has too much time on her hands. On a brighter note; Happy Valentine's Day to all!

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  12. I agree with Houndstooth. Not only will these new renters be a source of laughs all around the world but they'll force you to need a glass of wine on a regular basis.

    I love the photos of Wilf outdoors looking happy in the sunshine.

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  13. i wouldn't cut the wine. it's a shock to the liver. personally. on the other hand, we made the switch from belgian beers to wines thinking we'd drink less... but that didn't work when we started discovering great wine and pairing it with gourmet cuisine. now i must buy bottles for cooking AND drinking. it's very difficult this life. so ya, don't cut the wine. it doesn't seem right.

    as for the tenants... well, my stars, I don't think i could EVER let a flat that had chipped champagne glass! What is WRONG with you landlords? This is a tragedy indeed!

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  14. Amicable resolution to the wine issue: Give up Australian wines!

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  15. Hehehe...someone has to keep us on our toes! Thank goodness I don't have a flat to let out! :)
    Enjoy the Valentine's celebrations and a hug to Wilf too.
    Lotsaluv
    MAXMOM IN SA

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  16. "Floral suited and seemingly jovial".
    Sounds like Hyacinth Bucket.
    Beware.

    Love to Wilf on this Valentine's Day!

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  17. Your new tenants do sound interesting, I wouldn't give up the wine just yet, I have a funny feeling you might need a glass or two... ;)

    Happy Valentine's Day to all of you!

    Blessings and Love,
    Janelle and Maggie Mae

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  18. w00fs, those peoples need to get a dog, and then they will know all that little stuff dont matter to much..

    b safe,
    rocky

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  19. Missing egg cup, let them eat bread. What a twit.

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  20. I've said it before; you just can't make this stuff up! Wilf, you look happy and sunny this morning! Happy Valentine's Day to all!

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  21. I laughed quite loudly at Pamela Terry's comment about the floral suited tenant. Oh that does describe her, doesn't it?! Truly funny! Let's hope all calm can be restored, a new egg cup purchased promptly and back to being normal.

    As for Wilf, could he look anymore handsome today? Keep going Wilf, beautiful boy!!

    With love your still slightly frozen Canadian pals,
    Dianna along with Tor, Willow and Tucker

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  22. Happy Hearts Day, Wilf, Angus and the Font!!!

    Love,
    Piappies Fudgie, Princess, Frappie, Mocha, Sugar, Wai-Pai, Wai-Max & Forgie

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  23. Obviously they're not the TRUE BLUE 'near enough is good enough' Aussies!

    Perhaps you should offer them a short stay at the rickety farmhouse.

    XXXOOO Daisy, Kendra & Bella

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  24. You definitely need a drink now- with renters like that! Cheers and happy Valentine's day!

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  25. Good evening Wilf! Happy Heart Day! Your photos are grand as ever and everyone wants you to be their Valentine today and always.

    Angus, pfft! on giving up the wine. Don't you have enough stress? Maybe later, down the road a bit, but not now.

    Re the tenants. I understand why she would notify you of a miscount or something being chipped or cracked when they got there But a smear? Smear? On a vent? Poor woman needs many bottles of wine.

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  26. OhMyCat...what whiners! Wilf, you have the right take on the matter!

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  27. If the anal retentive renter finds those trivial issues greatly disappointing, I can only imagine how she would react if a dingo ate her baby! ;o) Maybe an afternoon with the old farmer would loosen her up.

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  28. Yes, buckets of love to Wilf on Valentine's Day. And Angus, your sense of humour never leaves you for long. Love love love your posts. Wilf looks splendid as always. Love, more than slightly frozen Bostonians, Suanne, and the sheltland sheepdog girls

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  29. I was hoping your floral-suited Mme "Bouquet" was just letting you know not to charge her for the missing egg cup or the chipped champagne glass -- kind of like checking out a rental car to identify all the dings. But that amicable reconciliation took it to another level.

    Ah, but today is a day for the sharing of sweet sentiments -- so Happy Valentine's Day -- if a bit close to midnight chez vous -- and loving scritches to the Wilfster!!!

    xxx Joan

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  30. "...wilf got the crumbs from the bottom of the croissant tray. these were drizzled slowly into his mouth amid much lip smacking and nose licking." this description totally brought a smile to my face. :)
    your london tenants must have been throwing a champagne and boiled egg party. a missing egg cup? egads!
    happy valentine's day to you!

    the booker man and asa's mama

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  31. Yikes! Hope you signed a SHORT lease with those PITA's [pains in the a#$]. Are you sure she didn't chip the champagne flute and break the egg cup herself, then try to blame it on you? After all, she should have gone over the inventory with your representative and a neutral witness when they first moved in. Good thing you counted the silver.

    Good to see Wilf looking so chipper! And still enjoying his croissant crumbs!

    Did you ever consider maybe the font just doesn't want to lose you? Your deprivation is her expression of love. Happy Valentine's Day!

    Jed & Abby

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  32. Long ago I rented out a house..........There was no pleasing them. Egad what a pain.
    Your renters sound , well, uh, like they think their certain bodily function don't stink.....(incorrect grammer, I know.) Hope it is easier to get a renter out than it was in Florida(where my house was at the time) even when they decided to stop paying rent....I said then never again.
    I say, give up the wine at a later date...if you must. Besides, they say it is good for your health(well, in moderation, but.....)
    Hugs and belly rubs for "our" boy Wilfee

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  33. PS SMEAR MARKS? SERIOUSLY????????

    It ain't fittin. It just ain't fittin.......

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  34. How funny that woman checked the inventory for egg cups and that she had to climb a ladder to check the top of the air conditioner. I had numerous people suggest I rent out one room or to move out of my house and rent it out but I think it'd be more trouble than it's worth so I've never done it.

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