Janis Joplin, Freddie Mercury and Madame Bay.

That all singing all dancing human rainbow , otherwise known known as Madame Bay , arrived bright and early this morning. This sobering vision of loveliness - orange ballet shoes, lime green leggings, pink angora sweater, purple pashmina and orange turban - stood in the kitchen, arms folded, looked around and declaimed " You've not made much progress here ". With that accusatory welcome she was off to tune all the radios to her favourite programme on the nostalgie channel. Diplomacy prevented a retort along the lines of "Progress can only be made in a country where the workmen bother showing up ".

Down into town with Wilf to escape the cacophony of Freddie Mercury in chorus with Madame Bay and the hoover. A relaxed morning coffee and bowl of water with the beer and absinthe crowd. We seem to have crossed some rubicon of acceptance. One of the absinthe imbibing gentlemen has a new maroon and chrome motability scooter which we were cordially invited to inspect. 'C'est magnifique!' I said, hoping that the enthusiasm sounded convincing. Do you think there are laws about drinking and driving motability scooters? If so he was over the limit by the time most folks are thinking about their second cup of coffee. Wilf gave me a look that called to mind that old Janis Joplin line : " Now that I'm here, where am I?"

Back home via the chocolatiere and the florists.